“Nothing can be sadder or more profound than to see a thousand things for the first and last time.” Victor Hugo

We have lived one year in Valencia, Spain. As I write that, I can’t fathom how that’s possible. That milestone fluttered in swiftly and softly…a flash of a butterfly … here and gone. Being enamored with a place, adapting to a mediterranean mindset, a rhythm and meter unlike any I have known, time lost dimension for us while we were being transformed. But here I am blinking rapidly in the sunlight at my first and last moments in Valencia, and I am aware we didn’t fully comprehend our metamorphosis over the last year while we were undergoing a change. But now with the molting slowing down, our opened suitcases and lives, expunged of the non- essential, suddenly glimpses of who we’ve become, stand in contrast to our bleary selves who disembarked just last July. In the process of shedding the protective chrysalis of Valencia in preparation of relocating to Granada, and downgrading from six stuffed suitcases to two, a three bedroom apartment down to one, and tossing a carryon of anxiety and inadequacy, I grasp the epiphany of evolving into a lighter being. I am deeply grateful for our year chorused by seagulls and renewed by sunshine, for the comfort and rest acquired while sleeping and waking to medieval church bells, for the growth of learning a new language, and thoughts, and for having time to practice the dropping of the tug-of-war rope in arguments to finally achieve peace. We are new beings rescued and rehabilitated by Spain.

When we arrived, despite COVID lockdowns, we were granted permission to work with a fabulous HGTV film crew from London. They followed us for three days as we searched for the perfect place to live in Valencia.

It is not lost on me that our first choice of apartments was also our last and best choice. While we’ve lived with bees making mud nests in the wall, and neighbors’ constant remodeling, we have also lived with the enthralling gurgling fountain in the plaza below, a terrace that affords cool breezes all summer long and the most mesmerizing sunsets that bath us in ochre light.

WISH LIST

While house hunting when filming HHI, we came up with a list of things we wanted in a home. It’s noteworthy to me that in life and home hunting, it’s inevitable that you end up with what you need more than with what you want. And therein lies the magic …when you evolve from someone who “wants what they want” to someone who is mindfully appreciative of anything and everything they receive.

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“If you want to achieve greatness, climb your own mountain…and use yourself as your first and last consultant.” Wayne Dyer

Initially, we didn’t know if we wanted to live by the sea or in the historic part of town. After some discussion, we realized we already knew we wanted to live on an ancient street surrounded roman ruins, by palaces turned into museums, near the central market to shop for fresh produce and to frequent shops as regulars.

“Look at everything as though you were seeing it for the first time or the last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with wonder.” Betty Smith

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ACTIVITIES

One of the lovely things about living in a coastal town is having abundant water sports readily available. We have done stand up paddle board on Guam, in Hawaii and Brazil, and we jumped right back into it in Spain. But Summertime in the water is slightly different than being in the water in the winter. We looked at the heavy surf driven higher by the wind and offered up silent prayers as we headed out with our boards.

“The first and last stages of living are crowned with prayer.” Edward McKendree Bounds

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When were at the surf shop picking up our boards, they recommended we not go out on the water. There were kite surfers and wind surfers past the breakers flying by at 60 mph. The sea in Valencia has many moods and various boisterous winds, and looking out of the churned water, we knew we were poised for wipeouts. But we got in and had our adventure anyway. We were both knocked off our boards but you aren’t a real paddle boarder if you haven’t been thrown. Steve gave the traditional high school football pep talk that we would give it 110% and would come out victorious and we did.

FAMILY

Along with wanting to get healthy with exercise and a Mediterranean diet, we also came to Valencia to do genealogy as Steve’s maternal side is from Spain. We learned during the Spanish Civil War that some churches were burned but that didn’t stop Steve from still trying to find family records. Steve’s language ability in Spanish and career has helped him contact civil government in various cities to locate family names. We will continue to look for family names in Granada as Steve’s great grandmother was born and married there.

“Your first and last and all-absorbing aim… excel… this is a source of happiness to your ancestors.” Plato

HOUSE #2 – the Winner

With olive oil tasting, shoe shopping, horchata sampling aside, we got busy finding a place to live. When we walked through the apartment for the first time, we instinctually knew this was where we’d call “home” for a time. It is easy to not “see things” when you see them everyday, but this last year, knowing it was a temporary stay, I have loved and admired the exposed brick in the apartment and marble kitchen and baths and the expansive terrace atop the 100 year old+ building. Because of COVID and Spain being shut down, we weren’t able to have family come visit. And just as we are preparing to leave, our episode hit the airwaves. Family and friends were able to see where we live, and their new eyes looking at our apartment has made us fall in love with the apartment all over again. It is hard to go, but who knows what the future hold, our road may bend and lead back to Valencia again.

“The last time is the one that gets you, because it leads right into the first time.”
― Rudolph Wurlitzer, 

“ In life there are countless firsts and even more lasts. The firsts are easy to recognize. When you’ve never experienced something before, you know exactly when you are encountering it for the first time. But lasts? Lasts nearly always surprise us. It’s only after they’ve disappeared that we realize we’ll never again have that particular moment or person or experience.” ― Frances de Pontes Peebles

ENDINGS

As a keeper of friends, memories and photos, I have found it is hard to let things go. But living a minimalist lifestyle the last year has given me numerous opportunities to practice with abundant thinking and gratitude. I am learning to appreciate the bounty of “what is” and let go of “what was. ” While I am still a lover of shoes, I have learned be happy with three pairs of espadrilles and am able to acknowledge it is enough. Letting go is a lesson in flight. I am lighter and my first pair of wings leaves me with exhilarating eye-opening perspectives. My first and last thought each day is pausing to appreciate our time in Valencia.

“Sometimes you just don`t know that it is the last time. But that`s a good thing, because if you did know, it would be almost impossible to let go .” 
― Lauren Oliver