CAMINO STAGE 19: La Isla to Villaviciosa Camino Del Norte Route of El Camino De Santiago. 14 miles, Day 20, 17 days to go
There’s a movie line from a 90s film, A League of Their Own, where Tom Hanks, a new coach of a women’s baseball team, angrily criticizes one of his female players. She cries, and he shouts at her: “There’s no crying in baseball,” and she cries even harder. Walking in the rain today with water dripping off the brim of my hat and running down my face, Steve looked over at me and said “You look pretty.” Laughing at the ridiculousness, I said “You’re joking, right?” I leaned in to give him a peck, and he said “there’s no kissing on the Camino!” and I laughed harder despite looking and feeling like the sodden pony nearby. This got me thinking of the myriad of vying emotions, conditions and responses in any given moment. We always have two ways of acting and responding to stimulus and situations. The baseball player in the movie could have quit, but she used her embarrassment and hurt to work harder and inspired other teammates. Hanks learned to bite his tongue instead of hollering when frustrated, and joked around with his players instead of criticizing to get results. His team rallied and won. Steve could have made the miserable situation worse by barking at me like the dog deep growling at us nearby and made frustrations worse as cars sped past and sprayed us with puddled rain, and muddy water seeped into our shoes, but he chose humor. I could have gotten offended, or snapped back, but laughed instead. We all are a two sided coins and have choices to stimulus. We chose to lumber on happily side by side and pick the best outcome of the duality, the two sides, the kind or the impatient, that we all possess.
To accept duality is to earn identity
Joss Whedon
“If we never experience the chill of a dark winter, it is very unlikely that we will ever cherish the warmth of a bright summer’s day. Nothing stimulates our appetite for the simple joys of life more than the starvation caused by sadness or desperation. In order to complete our amazing life journey successfully, it is vital that we turn each and every dark tear into a pearl of wisdom, and find the blessing in every curse.”
Anthon St. Maarten
Reaching the autumnal equinox, Fall is bringing on darker mornings and colder temps as we start our daily Camino. As hard as the 95 degree temps were a week ago, and as much as I wanted cooler temps, now the chilly rainy days, makes me miss the summer sunshine. My duality (getting what I want and then not wanting it) is funny to me. As I shiver in the September cold, I noticed what needs the sun but also thrives in the cold— the deep red apples ready to be harvested, cool weather vibrant flowers that enliven the dark, and the vibrant green fields glowing in the rain. The dichotomy in myself and in nature inspires and seems less confusing while walking the Camino. As I ponder the duality in both, I’m learning to embrace and appreciate the contrasts.
“Experience life in all possible ways — good-bad, bitter-sweet, dark-light, summer-winter. Experience all the dualities. Don’t be afraid of experience, because the more experience you have, the more mature you become.” Rajneesh
At one particularly hard moment, when tunnel vision happens and blocking out everything else is inevitable, Steve noticed this lovely spider web glistening in the rain. It was impressive to view the strength of such delicate strands. The wind and rain didn’t destroy it, it’s flexibility was its strength. The contrasts were beautiful and inspiring.
“You can’t have an up without a down. You can’t have a left without a right. This is duality. If you have a problem, you must already have the solution. If there’s tears, there’s laughter.” Byron Katie
“Those who do not weep, do not see.” Victor Hugo Les Miserable
Walking through Villaviciosa we found 17th and 18th century manor houses on two streets named Agua and Sol. Water and Sun. Fitting considering the opposing forces of rain and sun, like the laughter and tears, we’d experienced on this Camino stage. One manor home was particularly drab, and I nearly missed the importance. The nondescript brown 15th-century home was where the Holy Roman Emperor King Charles V once sought refuge during a storm on his trip to Colunga (a town we passed through on the day before’s walk). Charles V helped the people within as much as they helped him. I wondered about the people around us that we barely register, who are crying inside, not outwardly, needing help, and if we don’t look deeply to see their pain, we lose an opportunity to offer refuge to them and us with compassion.
There was also one tiny section of medieval wall from the 1200s. I walked right by not understanding what it was but Steve paused to read the plaque and called me back. This 800 year old wall fragment had withstood time. Kindness always stands through time. Tears are forgotten but genuine kindness remains. Two things in a forgettable town looking so innocuos and unimportant, and yet having historical and intrinsic importance. These were mini life lessons of looking at small details in our lives for the profound. Drying tears of others and replacing it with laughter.
Is there crying on the Camino? There are numerous teary eyed crying pilgrims we’ve encountered. A mom carrying an urn with her young daughter’s ashes, a woman divorced and reeling from betrayal, a millennial grieving for his friend’s death… we are all here carrying diverse types of pain, and possessing glistening eyes. It seems when we suffer, our eyes are open to others suffering and we shed tears for there heavy burdens.
“We need never be ashamed of our tears, for they are rain upon the blinding dust of earth, overlying our hard hearts. I was better after I had cried, than before–more sorry, more aware of my own ingratitude, more gentle.” Charles Dickens
We leave coastal Asturia behind and head inland tomorrow with the Picos de Europa “Peaks of Europe” mountain range beside us as we divert from the Camino del Norte to the Camino Primitivo. Coastal beaches and interior mountains are all part of the duality of our Camino.
“Don’t be ashamed to weep; ’tis right to grieve. Tears are only water, and flowers, trees, and fruit cannot grow without water.” Brian Jacques
The Unhurried Traveler 
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